Alleged Cow killing Tiger lynched in Sundarban

Note: This is a piece of satire

Reports are coming in from West Bengal that a tiger was lynched by a mob of angry men as a revenge for alleged killing and eating a cow caught on the border of a village in Sundarban national park . A local cow had gone missing a few days ago which had caused passions of the villagers to be inflamed leading to the lynching of the tiger. The forest department has sent the cow carcass to a lab in Kolkata for testing if the cow was killed by the tiger or died of natural causes. The local head of the National Right winged party has called the lynching of tiger an unfortunate accident which has lead to a huge media outrage. An unbiased forest guard has told the reporters that the mob which was already angry at the missing cow got even angrier encountering the now deceased tiger devouring the cow. He said, “Initially the crowd tried to run the tiger away but they really got violent when they noticed the tiger was circumcised. The tiger was beaten up mercilessly and its body paraded victoriously through the village”. Meanwhile, the magazine affiliated with an all India cultural organization has reported that certain stories from the fable book Panchatantra justifies the killing of a Tiger in revenge of cow killing in some of its stories. The vice president of a National party has called the claims of this renowned magazine false. He said, “I have read each and every story from Panchatantra. None of the stories justify Tiger killing as claimed by the magazine. This defaming of the Panchatantra will not be tolerated”. Meanwhile, a local political party leader has told the media that he would be raising this issue with the World Wildlife fund, a move which was denounced by severe well-known wildlife activists. A well-known tiger conversationalist said, “It is an appalling act. How can such a primitive and barbarous act be justified by the proxies of the National party.” While the politics over cow slaughter rages on, the winners of Big boss, Roadies and Splitsvilla have returned their awards as a protest against rising intolerance.

The Regional party from Western Maharashtra coming out against the Tiger lynching strongly. The said party has taken umbrage to the lynching of the Tiger as the Tiger is its party symbol on its flag. A cartoonist turned politician has claimed that the tiger was not an Indian circumcised tiger. He said, “Even in past there have been reports of circumcised tigers from Bangladesh coming illegally into Indian parts of Sundarban. Indian circumcised tigers never kill cows, they instead choose to kill and eat buffaloes. This inflow of illegal immigrant tigers has to be stopped at any cost. We are having a sabha at Azad maidan to address this issue.” As the national government has cracked down on cattle smugglers across the borders to Bangladesh , the tigers in Bangladesh are reportedly going hungry. An average built Bangladeshi man can provide enough food for a tiger for just a couple of days whereas a cow can be satiate the tiger for weeks. This may be leading some reckless tigers to cross the border and indulge in cow killing, greatly risking their lives for a week full of food. As the battle between the national animal and national mother goes on, it is expected that many more animals will lose their lives as a collateral damage of Indian bovine politics.